Hackers among us




Posted by Apathetic

[URL=http://www.adequacy.org/public/stories/2001.12.2.42056.2147.html]http://www.adequacy.org/public/stories/2001.12.2.42056.2147.html[/URL]
*oscar*




Posted by Poco

I'm scared of hackers because...
They hack into NASA 5%
They steal things 4%
They are violent sociopaths 4%
They use amphetamines and speed 7%
They help Osama Bin Laden 14%
They're un-American 5%
They smell bad 58%



I have lost all faith in humanity. Oh, and that gave me a laugh like I haven't had in ages. Quake a hacking program training people in the use of firearms. It made me lmao




Posted by higbvuyb


Quoted post: Topic:
Internet Idiocy
lol satire



Posted by Apathetic

AMD "They use child labor extensively in their third world sweatshops, and they deliberately disable the security features that American processor makers, such as Intel, use to prevent hacking."
rofl my wafl :D




Posted by higbvuyb


Quoted post: Linyos Torovoltos

lol



Posted by NegativeTrend

My Lord this is one of the most ancient things on the internet. It was funny. (in 2001)




Posted by thelaststand

lol, i didn't know bonzi buddy and better video card made u a hacker




Posted by Apathetic


Quoting NegativeTrend: My Lord this is one of the most ancient things on the internet. It was funny. (in 2001)

Wow, its that old? What sites was it on in 2001?



Posted by Klarth

The one you posted perhaps?




Posted by Chronic

That dude thinks hes a model parent his kids must be going threw hell with him following them everywhere.




Posted by speedemon35

I've read that article soo many times. I laugh so hard each time I read it...even if it is pretty old. Guess I'm The Hacker then LOL




Posted by Lethal Shadow

Comments
i am guilty (none / 0) (#6095)
by Anonymous Reader on Sat Jan 12th, 2002 at 02:12:28 PM PST
how could i have been so blind...i have been putting firewall after firewall on my system. when along along i have tryyng to keep myself out... yes now that i have read your article i realize that i am a hacker...I have reviewed my computer and discovered filthy programs running amuck everywhere...Flash. MP3's. DOS. BIOS. and the holy grail of hacking, yes its true I HAVE LINUX, i am so sorry and at this moment the police are on their way to put me away...THANK YOU for opening my unworthy eyes


...lol




Posted by speedemon35

There are some pretty hilarious comments there. About 500 of them at least are those kinda coments that make you laugh for a good 5 minutes. BUt it surprises me how some poeple can actually be that stupid. Or maybe he just posted that article to see how many people would flame him...




Posted by Lethal Shadow

I'm surprised that he didn't mention how Firefox is also a hacking tool :bonk:used to steal social security numbers and pay pal accounts.

I couldn't tell if he really was an idiot, or if it was a joke.

...again lol




Posted by higbvuyb

It's satire. People aren't so stupid. (there may be some exceptions)




Posted by wolfmaster

If your son isn't getting a "B-" or better in school he is a hacker!!!




Posted by speedemon35

So all the kids who can't even go to school to get a B- are hackers? LOL. The world is filled with hackers i guess. We're all gonna die because they've trained themselves with Quake




Posted by Azusa

Lol. Haven't laughed like that in awhile.

Did anyone read T. Reginald Gibbon's other articles? There was one in which he trys to link video games with automotive deaths.

"Worse yet, computer game driving simulations actively teach children to drive like maniacs, demanding maximum speed and minimum adherence to road laws in order to win. Games like "[url="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00005V6BE/adequacy-20"]Need for Speed[/url]", "[url="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00001ZUGL/adequacy-20"]Test Drive[/url]" and "[url="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/039301276X/adequacy-20"]Gran Turismo[/url]" all teach children that best driving practice involves running red lights, ramming cars and driving on the wrong side of the road. Most of these games don't even include turn signals!"




Posted by loony636


Quoted post: Responsible Internet Service Providers, such as AOL.


If being responsible means providing fast service and easy-to-use software to your users, then I think that AOL is about the least responsible ISP on the market.


Quoted post: [AOL] take careful measures to ensure that your internet experience is enjoyable, educational...


Bahahahahaha


Quoted post: Popular hacker software includes "Comet Cursor", "Bonzi Buddy" and "Flash".


OMG, my computer is infected with hacking software...and my cursors look cool, I have a weird monkey that appears on my screen to tell my lame jokes and I can make my own cartoon movies. Yey!


Quoted post: If your son has requested a new "processor" from a company called "AMD", this is genuine cause for alarm. AMD is a third-world based company who make inferior, "knock-off" copies of American processor chips.


Yey, my processor is inferior.


Quoted post: If your son spends more than thirty minutes each day on the computer, he may be using it to DOS other peoples sites.


So everyone that spends more than thirty minutes a day on the computer is a hacker....We are all doomed.


Quoted post: Quake is an online virtual reality used by hackers. It is a popular meeting place and training ground, where they discuss hacking and train in the use of various firearms.


People discuss things on Quake? Since when?


Quoted post: 8. Is your son obsessed with "Lunix"?

BSD, Lunix, Debian and Mandrake are all versions of an illegal hacker operation system


No comment.


Quoted post: If you see the word "LILO" during your windows startup (just after you turn the machine on), your son has installed lunix. In order to get rid of it, you will have to send your computer back to the manufacturer, and have them fit a new hard drive. Lunix is extremely dangerous software, and cannot be removed without destroying part of your hard disk surface.


Gee, that's a bit extreme.


Quoted post: If your son has undergone a sudden change in his style of dress, you may have a hacker on your hands. Hackers tend to dress in bright, day-glo colors. They may wear baggy pants, bright colored shirts and spiky hair dyed in bright colors to match their clothes. They may take to carrying "glow-sticks" and some wear pacifiers around their necks. (I have no idea why they do this) There are many such hackers in schools today


Total people spotted with hacker appearance described in above paragraph: 0
Total hackers existing today: 99999999999999999999999


Quoted post: This will cause his marks to slip dramatically, particularly in difficult subjects such as Math, and Chemistry. In extreme cases, over-exposure to computer radiation can cause schizophrenia, meningitis and other psychological diseases. Also, the reduction in exercise may cause him to lose muscle mass, and even to start gaining weight. For the sake of your child's mental and physical health, you must put a stop to his hacking, and limit his computer time drastically.


First mobile phone radiation, now computer radiation, where does it all come from?



Posted by speedemon35

Radiation comes from....T. Reginald Gibbon. Yes thats correct. His pea sized brain emits radiation that spreads around the world within seconds. You though it was from nuclear powerplants and things like that? Shame on you LOL
If we could only end his existance than radiation would disappear:P




Posted by KoH

*sigh* That thing that that dad wrote is so old... I mean, really really really old. Not only that, but the guy's an absolute moron. If he were serious about his concern, he's a dip****.

Not only that, but the term "hacker" isn't even used correctly. A hacker is someone who wants to learn or who messes with programs, a hacker doesn't perform illegal operations, that's just called a criminal.

Idiots.

"6. Does your son use Quake?

Quake is an online virtual reality used by hackers. It is a popular meeting place and training ground, where they discuss hacking and train in the use of various firearms. Many hackers develop anti-social tendencies due to the use of this virtual world, and it may cause erratic behaviour at home and at school."

What an idiot.

"7. Is your son becoming argumentative and surly in his social behaviour?"

WHAT TEENAGER ISN'T?!

"8. Is your son obsessed with "Lunix"?"

Linux, ****tard.

"9. Has your son radically changed his appearance?"

Again... teens....

"10. Is your son struggling academically?"

And for the final time... TEEN YEARS.

I hate it when people have no ****ing IDEA what the **** they're talking about.

Edit::: Rofl, sorry Loony. I added some **** to what you said though. Btw, as much as so many people think it funny, I find it annoying as HELL. Because I know that somewhere... some parents think that serious. And will just start misusing the term "hacker" even more than they do now.




Posted by thelaststand

http://www.johncglass.com/leethaxors.htm