No Internet Chronicles




Posted by Alastor

In my boredom and one-week Internet deprivation, I made a journal of sorts. SOME OF IT'S BORING. SOME OF IT MIGHT MAKE YOU LAUGH. I DUNNO.

TL;DR STARTS NOW

No Internet, Day 1

Tuesday. I arrived home from school and proceeded to open uTorrent, only to see that
all of my torrent icons were red. I "wtf"'d, and proceeded to open AIM and Firefox.
It was then that I became enraged, as all indicators said that my Internet
connection was fine. After some connection setting changes, I asked my parents
if the phone bill had been paid.

Thus began my re-entry into an Internet-less existence. Woe is me.

No Internet, Day 2

Wednesday. Intense boredom kicks in. Much to my surprise, I awake at 8 AM to see
a herd of Derp on Cartoon Network. This highly amuses me, so I rise from my bed
to watch the Derps cower before their Steelix overlord. Much fun is had until
8:30 AM, when some other ****ty show comes on. I am now literally angry with rage.
I alternate between playing music, playing Tales of the Abyss, Super Smash Bros.
Melee, playing music while playing Super Smash Bros. Melee, and so on.

Finally watched a few episodes of Neon Genesis Evangelion, which I torrented and then
didn't touch for about a week.

No Internet, Day 3

Thursday. Again I wake early, somewhere in the area of 9 AM only to find that
now the cell phones are turned off. I am now completely cut off from my Interweb
friends. AIM eludes me, mocking me constantly with a "Payment Due" error.
Thanks for kicking me when I'm down, Sprint.

My parents inform me that they are close to selling a load of block they
acquired a few weeks ago. Somewhere in the area of 75 cents a piece, they would sell
for $600+. They would use the money to immediately pay the house and cellular phone bills.
This overjoys me.

Watched some more Evangelion. Got 1 star on my MKDS records. Woohoo.
I can't remember the requirements to get the other two stars. :(

No Internet, Day 4

Friday. Awoke in the area of 10 AM. My TV remote stops working. Now I'm really outraged.
No luck selling the block. Now I'm even more outraged than really outraged.
My rage prohibits me from finding an adjective to describe the very intensity
of my rage. I have fury.

Watched moar NGE.

No Internet, Day 5

Saturday. Woke up around 10:30 to the sweet smell of scrambled eggs and bacon.
Dad found a friggin' sweet TV remote that's even better than my old one.
I got Natalia on Tales of the Abyss. She's twenty levels behind everyone else
since I'm playing with 10X EXP. Screw you and your low level, Natalia.

During the afternoon, my boredom grows ever stronger. It's now so strong that I'm even contemplating
giving up my Wii fund that I've accumulated thus far ($64) to help pay the phone bill. If I knew
I wouldn't punch myself in the testicles with regret later, I'd do it. Plus, knowing my
luck, it just would be turned off again next month. My boredom has driven me to "Sad Panda" status.
Is there any hope?

Finished the final episodes of NGE. The last two episodes blew ***.
Now I want to see the movie. Bad. I COULD TORRENT IT IF I HAD
INTERNET RIGHT NOW. HURHURHUR. Being poor ****ing sucks.

Watched 300. I was disappointed to see the only two parts of the movie I ever see people talk about
both come in the first 20 freaking minutes of the movie. It was madness.
Ah well. I liked it. Drawn out a bit, though. Great fight scenes, but I think it would've been
better if it were about a half-hour shorter.

No Internet, Day 6

Sunday. Woke up around 11:00. I'm seeing a pattern in the times I wake up. No idea why that is,
since I've gone to bed around 1:00 - 2:00 AM every night since Tuesday. Had a healthy breakfast
of Apple Jacks with no milk and off-brand Mountain Dew. Not together, though.
Not so much bored today as I am ****ed off. I find myself growing more and more tired of my parents
and sister just sleeping all the time. Just sleeping, sleeping, and sleeping. It's not that they're
not at jobs paying the phone bill for me or anything like that. They're just sleeping their lives away.
I wouldn't even care if they were AWAKE and doing something like watching TV. Sleeping all day sucks. I don't see how they do it constantly.

My back started hurting like hell while playing ToA. No matter what position I sit or lay in, my back was killing me. Eventually I played standing up for about 10 minutes, then it got a little better. Lucky me.

No Internet, Day 7

Monday. Woke up at 11:30, continuing my wake-up time trend for whatever reason. I suppose I'll have to break the trend since I have to wake up around 7 AM tomorrow for summer school. What fun. I'm playing through Twilight Princess. It's killing time, yes, but I'd much rather be gooning around on VGC, making a TVGCS, playing Gunbound, pirating music and movies, or yelling at Chris for being a Maplefag. I have high hopes on getting the Internet restored soon. We get a $300 - $400 check every month for having a tower built on some land we own, and apparently the phone bill is only in the $200 area. Here's hoping, for sanity's sake.

I should go to town and get a haircut and some Febreeze today... My hair is really long and my chair smells like *** sweat on a summer day. I'm not terribly fond of either of those.

Haircut Get. No Febreeze, though. Also, promises from my mom that my dad gets paid on Wednesday, and that we'll use the money on the phone bill. I believe her. Even if we don't for whatever reason, the tower check comes either this or next week, so it's (hopefully) only a matter of time. I'm itchy from all of the hair. Perhaps I'll take a shower now.

Hm. Everyone went to the lake. Had to stay for summer school tomorrow, so I have the house for myself. I'M TOTALLY SLEEPING IN THE NUDE TONIGHT.

No Internet, Day 8

Tuesday. Average day at summer school. Why is it that from Pearl Harbor to the end of World War II was covered in just two pages, yet some religious crap that went on at Princeton spanned three or four? I really loathe my curriculum sometimes.

Family still didn't come home, but Internet and family both return tomorrow. Off to watch Adult Swim until I get sleepy.

No Internet, Day 9

Wednesday. Woke up at 8 AM because the **** cat ran full speed then collided with my door. Idiot.
Went back to sleep until 11:30. The cat kept waking me up so I finally got up and played Twilight Princess for a few hours. Had to run to the store to get gas, Pringles, and Live Wire, then decided to hit Hardee's for lunch. Thickburgers for the win.

Figured I should check the mail for my dad's check since I have nothing else to do, but holy **** there's a ****ing huge spider in the mailbox go****.

Just talked to dad on the phone. Phone bill's been paid, and service should be restored before 8 PM. Now I play the waiting game.

**** it, it's 8:40 PM and the Internet is still off. The PHONE is on, but the Internet isn't. My ISP can go suck an elephant's **** tube. >=O

WHAT THE ****, IT'S 11 PM AND STILL NO INTERNET. I'VE BEEN ON HOLD WITH MY ISP'S ****ING TECH SUPPORT FOR TEN MINUTES WHAT THE ****. SUCK A POLAR BEAR'S FUNKY ***, WINDSTREAM.

go**** mother****ing jesus **** i finally got tech support but some **** about their pings aren't reaching the modem or some ****ing **** go**** they have to send someone out tomorrow to run some tests jesus **** i'm ****ed and tired now **** i'm going to ****ing go to bed or some **** go****




Posted by BLUNTMASTER X

see, I'd kinda like an internetless week. I sort of have a dependency on it. When it went down in May for three days, I got so much stuff done that I normally wouldn't get around to - seeing the whole Indiana Jones trilogy, completing two games, clearing my HDD, reading a book...

also, selling blocks?! Is your dad a drug dealer?!




Posted by Zeta

I lol'd at your suffering. So sorry. :(

[quote]Got 1 star on my MKDS records. Woohoo.
I can't remember the requirements to get the other two stars.

Get at least 2 stars on every Grand Prix cup for the 2-star record. 3 on every Grand Prix for 3 star record.




Posted by Alastor

I figured for the 2 star one. Wasn't sure on 3.

And no @ the block thing. My uncle ran his own repo trailer outlet (actually made a killing on it), but he moved all of the trailers he had up to a seperate lot in Tennessee, and now he works for someone else, and makes even more money, I think. My mom got the idea to gather up all of the leftover blocks that'd been sitting around and resell them. They've already sold most of them, I think.




Posted by Ant

THAT WAS A FUN CHRONICLE OF YOUR JOURNEY! Although I was surprised to find out your summer school starts so late in the summer :$




Posted by BLUNTMASTER X

summer school? I've never been!




Posted by Ant

I went twice during high school. lol failed english both times.




Posted by BLUNTMASTER X

Is it just a place you go if you fail a subject? bummer




Posted by Ant

or your parents hate you




Posted by BLUNTMASTER X

A couple of overly-studious girls in my class went to a school this summer that prepared them for applying to be a doctor.

Never heard of summer school though. :D




Posted by Alastor

It's not late considering my school starts at 8:30 during the year.

Normal, Monday - Thursday is 8:30 - 3:00.
Normal, Friday is 8:30 - 12:30. (Fridays rule.)
Summer School, every Tuesday, 9:00 - 3:00.

Also, my summer school's vololuntary.




Posted by BLUNTMASTER X

Wait, VOLUNTARY?! AS OPPOSED TO THE NORMAL BEING MANDATORY?!

You mean, they can make you give up your summer? man i am now proud to be a eurofag




Posted by Alastor


Quoting The X: You mean, they can make you give up your summer? man i am now proud to be a eurofag


I'm pretty sure it's a common punishment. But I've been in a private school since the fifth grade, so I'm not positive.



Posted by BLUNTMASTER X

too poor to pay a phonebill

but rich enough to go to private school

PARADOX DETECTOR ONLINE




Posted by Alastor

It's cheap. And I don't even have to pay tuition, personally. It's a Christian school, shares the same name as a local church. My, uh, uncle I guess, I'm not actually sure how I'm related to him, founded the church and the school, so I'm in good with all the higher-ups basically. Part of the offering to the church goes to my tuition every month. So basically it's free.

My aunt and grandma worked that out, somehow. Because my cousin still has to pay, for whatever reason. His dad is a deacon at the church, and his grandfather is the founder of the church and school. Why they pay for mine and not his, I don't know, but I'm not complaining.




Posted by Ant

pity




Posted by Linko_16


Quoting Alastor: No Internet, Day 9

Wednesday. Woke up at 8 AM because the **** cat ran full speed then collided with my door. Idiot.
Went back to sleep until 11:30. The cat kept waking me up so I finally got up and played Twilight Princess for a few hours. Had to run to the store to get gas, Pringles, and Live Wire, then decided to hit Hardee's for lunch. Thickburgers for the win.

Figured I should check the mail for my dad's check since I have nothing else to do, but holy **** there's a ****ing huge spider in the mailbox go****.

Just talked to dad on the phone. Phone bill's been paid, and service should be restored before 8 PM. Now I play the waiting game.

**** it, it's 8:40 PM and the Internet is still off. The PHONE is on, but the Internet isn't. My ISP can go suck an elephant's **** tube. >=O

WHAT THE ****, IT'S 11 PM AND STILL NO INTERNET. I'VE BEEN ON HOLD WITH MY ISP'S ****ING TECH SUPPORT FOR TEN MINUTES WHAT THE ****. SUCK A POLAR BEAR'S FUNKY ***, WINDSTREAM.

go**** mother****ing jesus **** i finally got tech support but some **** about their pings aren't reaching the modem or some ****ing **** go**** they have to send someone out tomorrow to run some tests jesus **** i'm ****ed and tired now **** i'm going to ****ing go to bed or some **** go****


Holy crap, dude, I wouldn't want to tangle with you after ten days without internet.

I forgot you had a sister. I also forget, is she hawt?




Posted by Ant

ant says no.




Posted by Vampiro V. Empire

You know, I don't mind being without the internet when I'm away, it's not such a big deal, but when you have it but it's just not working... **** that's annoying. I know exactly where you're coming from. Typically I couldn't care less, but when it's a ****up, ugh.




Posted by Alastor


Quoting Linko_16: Holy crap, dude, I wouldn't want to tangle with you after ten days without internet.


And I was exaggerating with all of the cursing. Remember, before I got back in May, I'd been seven months without internet. I was frustrated because there was no real reason for it not to be working. Even the tech support woman didn't know what the problem was.

Edit: Also, there's a ton of Wesley Willis and Mudkip references hidden in those asterisks.



Posted by Lord of Spam

did you ever get around to cutting the mullet?




Posted by Alastor

Wasn't really a mullet, but yeah, I got a haircut Monday. My hair is always longer in the front than it is in the back, but it's always relatively short. I don't have metal hair like most of you guys. I probably have the second shortest hair in DA though, next to Zeta. Maybe LoS. And idk what lolin looks like.




Posted by Omni

Mine isn't that long.




Posted by Alastor

[url=www.myspace.com/thedanslice]pix[/url] or it didn't happen




Posted by Ant

I'll probably have to get my hair cut next week. :/




Posted by Alastor

hahaha




Posted by Ant

Eh, two good things about it is: 1. my neck has been getting very hot lately. and 2. when I lean back and raise my head up too quickly my hair gets stuck between me and whatever I'm laying against and is very annoying.

sadly, I look like a moron with short hair.




Posted by BLUNTMASTER X

ant's myspace name should be ANT hero

i should remake my myspace, if i can remember my password




Posted by Ant

hmmmmm.




Posted by Alastor


Quoting Ant: sadly, I look like a moron all the time.


fixed.



Posted by Ant

DUR DUR DUR YA GOT ME




Posted by Alastor

I suuuuure did. :link:




Posted by Lord of Spam

my hair is currently no longer than a quarter of an inch. lulz. and it'll be getting buzzed on either tuesday or wednesday of next week.

SHORT HAIR WINRAR IS ME




Posted by Alastor

yeah well

dracula called




Posted by Lord of Spam

does she want her penis back?




Posted by BLUNTMASTER X

[IMG]http://castlevania.classicgaming.gamespy.com/Images/Scans/SotN/dx06.jpg[/IMG]





ENOUGH TALK. HAVE AT YOU, LORD OF SPAM!




Posted by Lord of Spam


Quoting Alastor: Wasn't really a mullet.


whoa, wait, **** you, how dare you not respond to my awesome willis reference.



Posted by Linko_16


Quoting Alastor: I was frustrated because there was no real reason for it not to be working. Even the tech support woman didn't know what the problem was.


Been there.



Posted by Lord of Spam

wow, nobody is taking the bait. i even make a dracula penis joke and linkos just like "meh"




Posted by Alastor

zoom

or is it woosh




Posted by Linko_16


Quoting Lord of Spam: wow, nobody is taking the bait. i even make a dracula penis joke and linkos just like "meh"


Oh, I noticed it. Sorry I didn't say anything. :/



Posted by Vampiro V. Empire


Quoted post: and 2. when I lean back and raise my head up too quickly my hair gets stuck between me and whatever I'm laying against and is very annoying.


Heck yeah! I remember when that would happen all the time.



Posted by Alastor

Mine's never been long enough for me to have that problem. :cool: