Also, this:
That shirt looks good on you, but it would look even better stuffed into the neck of a vodka bottle and flung burning through our office building's window.
does anybody say pickup lines and do they actully work, does the girl or guy like afterwards, it never works for me :(
Pick up lines are a serious waste of time. I think, when we get down to it, I just utilize them for jokes. Just go with the flow man, make a good solid move that isn't too overdone or oppressive towards her actions. Then again, you can always let time take it's toll.
Cash also works.
"**** on my dick or blood on my knife" works a charm
"Hey baby, wanna ****?"
That usually gets them.
'Hey baby, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?'
Then I drag them home for some PRIMAL SEX
The X beat me to it.
nice shoes lets fck ftw
you know soldiers need hummers help support the cause.
It works for me only cause i am a soldier.
ARE U A PARKING TICKET, CUZ U GOT FINE WRITTEN ALL OVER U.
I don't use'm, because I don't like talking in general.
My dick is like thiissssss big
"This dick isn't going to suck itself."
If that doesn't work, trying coining it with "Or will it?"
"f**k me if i'm wrong but is your name arty"
and the their is my favorite
"hey babe i had a dream about you last night...wanna help me change my sheets?"
jk
i just use them as conversation starters or jokes
"Hey bitch, you like pizza?"
"What, no!?"
"Wanna fuck?"
[quote=KoH;589424]Cash also works.
The kid has charm.. they'll also take credit. But keep that on the downlow, ya' Kock, chicks don't like coming off as hookers.
Pick up lines NEVER work and NEVER will unless the girl is some trashy peice of ****.
They can be funny though.
Hello I'm with the FBI, Fine Body Investigators. I'm going to have to ask you to assume the position.
If it weren't for pickup lines, I wouldn't be married today.
That's the Punk Rock way!!!!
Hey Mix, you like Punk Rock?
Me neither. Wanna fuck?!
Nope. I haet pickup lines.
Just to let you know, I am not really married.
more sarcasm
Marriage is for losers afraid to stay in the game.
Hm, no one's mentioned thus far the very obvious fact that one must be at least "average looking" in order to really associate with the opposite sex, let alone use something as terribly vile as a 'pickup line.'
Did you fart? Because you blow me away..
i have some pick-lines i use on girl - friends for jokes but not to start a conversation when i first meet them...here goes... ahem...
my love for you is like die-a-rea .... i cant hold it in....lol
is this the matrix..? cause i think your the ONE
hey ! you look alot like .... MY NEXT GIRLFRIEND !!!
i got more i just cant remember them....
I would snap the necks of a thousand genome soldiers if [...]
Do you think love can bloom, even on a battlefield?
[quote=The X;591490]Do you think love can bloom, even on a battlefield?
Son, love is a battlefield.
I got one how about "I wish you were my homework so I can do you on the table
"I'll make you a mama!"
So, I heard you have a penis.
I love getting pick-up lines. They're good ice breakers because the guy dishing them out knows he's being lame.
agreed ok here is another one
i may have a avg size dick but im rich!!!
agreed ok here is another one
Im the one u got to blow to get a drink around here!!!
Oh **** it, my friend tried this one once. Swear he comes up with some of the most nonsensical bull****, it's funny though in a corny drunk fashion.
"So, do you like Family Guy?"
"Have you ever slept with someone from the opposite sex?"
"Would you like to?"
By that time he just pounced the poor girl and floundered over her like a drunk fish.
Hi, have you got a boyfriend? (if no,) Are you taking applications
Hey, how
I always liked Quagmire's.
"So, you girls ever been penetrated?"
I think if you want pick up lines, just listen to Weird Al's 'Wanna B ur Lovr'
[quote]I don't have a library card
But do you mind if I check you out?
I like your skeletal structure, baby
You're an ectomorph, no doubt
Your face is real symmetrical
And your nostils are so nice
I wish that I was cross-eyed, girl
So I could see you twice
Girl, you smell like Fritos
That's why I'm giving you this hungry stare
You're so hot, you're gonna melt
The elastic in my underwear
I'll bet you're magically delicious
Like a bowl of Lucky Charms
You'd look like Venus de Milo
If I just cut off your arms
What I'm tryin' to say is ...
I wanna be your lover, baby
I need somebody to love
You know I just wanna be your lover, baby
Now, I need somebody to love
Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo
Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo
Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo
Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo
Do you believe in love at first sight
Or should I walk by again?
My love for you'd like diarrhea
I just can't hold it in
Stop, drop and roll now
'Cause baby, you're on fire
I'll bet your outfit
Makes a lot of noise in the drier
You're absolutely perfect
Don't speak now, you might spoil it
Your eyes are even bluer
Than the water in my toilet
Say, has anyone ever told you
You've got Yugoslavian hands?
No, of course not, that would be stupid
Just forget I ever brought it up
The point I'm trying to make is ...
I wanna be your lover, baby
I need somebody to love
You know I just wanna be your lover, baby
Now, I need somebody to love
Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo
Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo
Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo
Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo
I wanna be your Krakatoa
Let my lava flow all over you
I wanna be your anaconda
And your heat-seeking missile too
I wanna be your beef burrito
Am I making this perfectly clear?
I wanna be your love torpedo
Are you picking up the subtle innuendo here?
Uh huh
I hope I'm not being forward
But do you mind if I chew on your butt?
You can tell me truthfully
Am I a steamin' hunk of love now, or what?
There just aren't enough o's in "smooth"
To desribe how smooth I am
Maybe you've seen my picture
It's in the dictionary under "Kablaam!"
My lips are registered weapons
Can I invade your personal space?
You must have fallen from heaven
That would explain how you messed up your face
Well, how'd you get through security?
'Cause, baby, you're the bomb
I'd like to take you home right now
So you can meet my mom
Because I ...
I wanna be your lover, baby
I need somebody to love
You know I just wanna be your lover, baby
Now, I need somebody to love
Girl, you must be Jamaican
Because Jamaican me crazy
Girl, you must be Jamaican (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)
Because Jamaican me crazy (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)
I wanna be your lover, baby (Girl, you must be Jamaican) (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)
I need somebody to love (Because Jamaican me crazy) (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)
You know I just wanna be your lover, baby (Girl, you must be Jamaican) (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)
Now, I need somebody to love (Because Jamaican me crazy) (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)
I wanna be your lover, baby (Girl, you must be Jamaican) (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)
I need somebody to love (Because Jamaican me crazy) (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)
You know I just wanna be your lover, baby (Girl, you must be Jamaican) (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)
Now, I need somebody to love (Because Jamaican me crazy) (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)
I wanna be your lover, baby (Girl, you must be Jamaican) (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)
I need somebody to love (Because Jamaican me crazy) (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)
You know I just wanna be your lover, baby (Girl, you must be Jamaican) (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)
Now, I need somebody to love (Because Jamaican me crazy) (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)
I wanna be your lover, baby (Girl, you must be Jamaican) (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)
I need somebody to love (Because Jamaican me crazy) (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)
You know I just wanna be your lover, baby (Girl, you must be Jamaican) (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)
Now, I need somebody to love (Because Jamaican me crazy) (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)
You look like my World of Warcraft charecter, wanna go back to my place and do some PvP? lol, if that works, just walk away....
"Hey, sweetie. Want some chocolate?"
works every time
What?
I love how Down The Sun's line was completely wrong and no-one called him on it.
Also, this:
That shirt looks good on you, but it would look even better stuffed into the neck of a vodka bottle and flung burning through our office building's window.
So, will wins this thread. Well played.
[quote=WILLETH FOR MONTHS;608088]I love how Down The Sun's line was completely wrong and no-one called him on it.
Wait. What the **** are we talking about. **** it, *******. ;)
interblag
I got some! :D:
[LIST]
[*]"I've been thinking about this for awhile and don't take this offensively but we should totally ****..."
[*]"I've been staring at you from the corner for awhile now and I think we should do it..."
[*]"You ever wanted to learn french? Really? Well I can show you how you use your tounge."[/LIST]
I need to draw a map of your eyes
I find myself getting lost in them
then you whip out pad and start drawing
or just ask if they'd ever like to be in a pron
are you wearing space pants? because that booty is out of this world!!
I got one,
I'm like milk I can do your body good
That dress looks good on you, but it would look even better on my bedroom floor.
Did it hurt?
Did what hurt?
When you fell from Heaven?
Do you have a mirror in your pocket, because I can see myself in your pants.
What say you and I do some math together? You plus me minus our clothes, divide your legs and lets multiply.
Now, where did I ever say anything about pizza? And, that pick up line can be changed up to work for any type of food that you consider as good as sex, itself.
I should know, used each variation on my ex for ****s and giggles. When, all I really need to do is.. sit next to her in silence. Drives her nuts.
EDIT: [quote=Down The Sun;589610]"Hey bitch, you like pizza?"
"What, no!?"
"Wanna fuck?"
Touch
[quote=Down The Sun;589610]The kid has charm.. they'll also take credit. But keep that on the downlow, ya' Kock, chicks don't like coming off as hookers.
Personal checks are surprisingly not that popular... Guess they know my credibility to pass off a bounced check.
I've always been tempted to walk up to a completely gorgeous and hot girl and simply ask:
"Can my peepee sneeze in your vagina?"
Will update this post if I ever accomplish this task.
How much does a Polar Bear weigh? Just enough to break the ice.
If anyone used a pick-up line on me for serious, I'd punch them.
There was a time at an elementary school spring fair, when I was doing community service, a guy tried starting up conversation with me 'cause he thought I was hot. The first words out of his mouth were:
"You waiting for your kids?"
O_o; Wtf man, I'm ****ing 16, do I look like could have children by now...
Also, he was 20, why would he want to have sex with a momma anyway? Too much baggage. >_>