I guess I'll start one...

My friends and I went to Universal yesterday. I'm the blue shirt.



Haha, that old guy was awesome.



I kick ***: http://mario-kart.net/ezupload/images/SSPX1732.mov

And I get my *** kicked: http://mario-kart.net/ezupload/images/SSPX1734.mov

And I kick *** again: http://mario-kart.net/ezupload/images/SSPX1737.mov

Beat Jaws down: http://mario-kart.net/ezupload/images/SSPX1724.mov

Lookin' good :cool:

LIVESTRONG bands for the win!

EDIT: What in the world are those bat like things?

[COLOR="Black"]First video, wins.[/COLOR]

These are the bands I was wearing. I usually wear two in case somebody wants one.

We won those inflatable bats, and then proceeded to hit eachother with them the rest of the day.

I keep laughing at the thought of what would happen if those were real bats...

Hahaha, I'd be in the hospital, if not dead.

What is your friend (that is your friend, right?) pointing at in that last pic?

Just the sky. He's imitating Babe Ruth.

Aww crap...that last pic wont show up, I missed the fun...

Those look like some nice pics Jon. The first time I looked in the picture I was halfway accros my room, and thought you friend was holding a dildo :rolleyes:

One the first pic...you thought that guy was holding a huge black dildo? ROFL

One day I was sitting at home. Bored. Brian (bro) was asleep and Carla (his wife) didn't want to cheat on her husband with me.


Then suddenly, an evil alien ninja appeared.


Too bad for that white mother****er, I'm a certified Man in Black. I shot his *** and made him spill his own blood.


I then stuck his dead carcass up my ***, and I was overall pretty glad about the day I had.

Bump.



Old picture of me. I'm only like 16 or 17. Like my hair?

Lovin' the Men in Black story :D

I'm gonna get 20th century fox to look at this and see if they hire you :P

That'd be good. I'm easy to work with.

Here's something new I spent 15 minutes on...


I was going for a Sin City look. I kinda succeeded.

Yeah baby...

your shower cutains have fishies on them <3
(Yes thats about all I got from this thread)

See me in spandex: http://www.jongasm.com/jonfear.wmv

We get to the first show and they're taking people for auditions. Up to 24 people get to try, and 6 people will make it on the show. My friend Tj and I audition for the show. My other friends Chris and Scott ask if they can do the bug eating contest, and they do.

To weed people out, they have you do Simon says, and some other things that show your listening skills and your creativity. They ask us what our greatest fear is, and instead of doing some kind of inside joke, I just went with "being paralyzed." She seemed to like this answer, I doubt she hears it often. Most people say "bugs" or "sharks" or "spiders."

So they weed a few people out after that, and I get called for the 2nd audition round. Then they ask us to tell them our name, where we live, and why we're going to win today. I say, "My name is Jonathan, I'm from Florida, and I'm going to win because ... (pauses, looks around) there is simply no competition." After saying that, all the people watching go "OOOOOOOOH."

Then the lady goes, "If I call your name, you're on the show, and I want to see a victory dance." So she called my name, and I strut over doing a horribly funny dance and everyone laughs and it's a good time. I'm excited. My friend Tj did not make it.

They have us watch some safety videos and sign waiver forms saying we won't sue them due to physical damage or mental embarrassment. They go over all the stunts and safety stuff backstage. I meet this guy named Jonathan, another contestant, and I tell him that one of us needs to win just to represent the Jonathan name. He's cool with that so we do a little handshake. He says that he thinks I'm gonna win because I look like the most fit, and I say that I think he has a good chance since he used to do Ironman competitions. And guess what - he won. He represented.

Backstage they have us do our TV interview, that was neat. I felt like an actor. Then they have us strip down naked in a bathroom and change into their clothes, including disposable underwear. This is the weirdest and most uncomfortable underwear imagininable. After putting on my spandex pants and shirt though, it was quite comfortable, and I felt **** sexaaay. I checked out my OWN ***, I was THAT HAWT.

We go out there, they introduce us to the crowd, I wave and just basically act as cocky as possible, as if they're all there to see me. It got laughs.

The first event has us hanging 50 feet in the air while holding onto a slippery bar. I was able to get a good grip on it by locking my thumbs, but it started hurting my arms real bad after about 30 seconds. The last four remaining moved on, so I planned on being the third one down to conserve arm endurance. It was starting to get really painful, but I just used mind over matter, and finally another person fell so I gleefully let go. They also had high powered fans start blowing in our faces to help us fall.

We go backstage to get ready for the next event. At this time my friends Chris and Scott go against another team of two in a bug drinking/eating contest. My friends whipped the other team by just gulping it down. They got cups that said WE ATE BUGS AT FEAR FACTOR LIVE!

Anyway, I'm getting tired of typing now so I will condense it. The 2nd event had me running, getting bean-bags out of a tank of eels, and throwing it to my partner to catch. Then he had to take squids and throw them for me to catch while he was swinging in the air. The other team did a little better than us, so we were eliminated.

The host asked me, "So what happened out there?"
Jon: Well, I just didn't catch them squid.
Host: Ah, I see. Well sir, what happened?
My partner: Well, I just didn't throw good.
Host: Aww, you guys aren't blaming each other, ya know, this is like a Hallmark moment.
Jon: Well he's my new homie.
Host: Now it's time for you to go down the WALK OF SHAME!
*Jon walks out, kissing to all his many fans.*

I was required to take a shower and get changed. They told us to put everything in a bin. I never found that bin, and I decided to keep something for myself from the event. I KEPT THE DISPOSABLE UNDERWEAR, AND THERE'S A PICTURE OF IT BELOW! I BEAT THE SYSTEM SUCKAS!!! They were going to throw it away anyhow.

So yeah, fun stuff. I consider that my practice run. I'm going to do it again eventually and bring my good nice camera to record it with. My friend recorded me with his video phone, and while the quality isn't too bad, as you can see by watching the video, it's not too good either.



PAPER UNDERWEAR IS SO SEXAY! AND I AM SUNBURNED!!

Rofl again. I called 20th century fox. They ROFL'd so much they died on the carpet. Sorry dude. :P

You know you spend too much time online when you make an image macro of yourself.

i lol'd

lol I fell off my chair :P

I saw this guy on 4chan:


I'm trying to look like him:


I need to work on my angle and lighting.

Dude, if you go to 4chan.... we gotta try to get people together and get a massive b-tard Snakes on a Plane invasion.

Very good job of these. More please. =D

Here's a sexy one:

AWWw that last pic was sooo cute.

I found it more disturbing.

Hey, I've been on that MiB: Alien Attack thing before! Pretty fun.

That last one is pure furry faggotry.

...

I'm not sure what scares me more, you, the dog, or the fact that iit appears as though you're naked iin bed WIITH the dog.

The real question is - which thought turns you on the most?

Viccica is a girl, so the fact that your naked in the bed is probably not the thought. I think the dog with you scares her more lol

Ugh! I'm shot! :-D

Jon is tired.



Jon is awake now, hahaha.

AWAKE IN THE PANTS AMIRITE

cute chick, though. Girlfriend of yours?

U-R-RITE.

Yeah, that's my girlfriend.

Wet suits are fuuun. you know how to stay warm, right;)

Does that bag say "The Bag Bag."?

Wow Jon thats quite the suit :eek: What sport do you use it for?

Haha, I've heard about that staying warm trick. ;)

Yes, the bag bag. It holds bags.

I use it for swimming, tubing, and whenever else I feel like wearing it.

Fap? It'd be hard to fap wearing that, lol.

Where theres a will, theres a way.

Exactly ;)

You know you like it.

Hahahahah, "jongasm".

jongasm.com.

What made me laugh the most were the sites you support. :)

Haha, I get a lot of flack for that it seems. But hey, they are good causes!! :)

No doubts. I just never heard of them in my entire life ;)

Time for a late night egocentric post!


Oh yes, we look soooo pretty.


My car was not complete without my plate!


Oh my *** girl, you are simply faaaaaabulous!!!


Look at me. See how I added the white border? I'm so artistic!

You are artistic, by jove! Nice use of Paint ;)

Nice pictures. Who's the other guy?

That's my friend Dan. We were out with our girlfriends playing some classic mini golf.

I like the 3rd picture. Made me laugh.