Found from MySpace.com and I had a good laugh.
[quote=MySpace.com]HEAVY METAL:
The protagonist arrives on a Harley Davidson, kills the dragon, drinks some beers and ****s the princess
GRIND METAL:
The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and then leaves...
POWER METAL:
The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the
dragon, saves the princess and they make love in an enchanted forest
TRASH METAL:
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princes and
****s her....... easy and quick
FOLK METAL:
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing accordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (from all the dancing) protagonist leaves without the princess
VIKING METAL:
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his migthy
axe, cooks and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals the castle and burns the place before he leaves
DEATH METAL:
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, ****s the princess and
kills her, then leaves
BLACK METAL:
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it
in the front of the castle.....then sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her.....then he impales the
deflowered princess
GORE METAL:
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in the front of the castle, ****s the princess and kills her....then he ****s again her dead body, slashes her belly open and eats her guts, ****s the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and ****s it for the last time
DOOM METAL:
The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks that he never could beat him, gets depressed and commits suicide....the dragon eats his body and the princess as well
PROGRESSIVE METAL:
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo for 26 minutes, the dragon kills himself out of boredom, the protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques learned in the last year of the conservatory... the princess escapes, and is now looking for the "HEAVY METAL" protagonist
GLAM METAL:
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter, he steals the princess' make-up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink color
INDUSTRIAL METAL:
The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes an obscene gestures towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.
Can I have the direct link?
nu-metal
The protagonist arrives on a skateboard and begins complaining about how nobody listens to him and how his life sucks and how the rest of the world is so stupid and listens to "gay ****". The Dragon gets irate and eats him, but chokes on the excessive piercings and weird straps hanging off of the black, baggy pants. The princess goes off and nails BJ instead.
Hah, I read this so many years a go and I still get a laugh out of it. It used to actually have a really funny title to it to, but I can remember it now.
Symphonic Metal - The protagonist turns into a strange opera singer with an unintelligible voice and hires many musicians to literally "blow away" the dragon, but kills the dragon by accidentally singing too raucously and everyone is crushed by its dead body.
Shred Metal - The protagonist brings a guitar, and everything around him disappears as soon as he arrives. Forgetting the original point of him coming there, he plays guitar until the end of time.
Rap Metal - Bj's Nu-Metal one, except the protagonist talks really quickly and arrives with a "posse" of at least five others, four of whom do absolutely nothing but shout and look intimidating in photo shoots.
k