Dexterous Romance

[Dexter]

Dexter: Sorry I couldn't answer. Little Donna was showing me her dress for that Asian Cinema thing.
Jaime: its fine. I was just calling to let you know your girlfriend is upset
Dexter: I know. It's for the lulz.
Jaime: What?
Dexter: Basically she likes me too much, therefore she expects a lot more from our relationship, which in turn makes me look like the sworn enemy of the Asians because I'm seemingly distant and occupied with other, more essential activities.
Jaime: like getting your 15-year old friend a dress? lol
Dexter: This night is important to us, and thus we give it our full attention. We can't allow romance to interfere with our O.A.C.
Jaime: oac?
Dexter: Operation Asian Cinema.
Jaime: lol
Jaime: well you should try to spend some time with Abi. shes your girlfriend!
Dexter: I don't like her having that title. You're my girlfriend, Alex is my girlfriend. Abi is more of a romantic partner and future possible mother product for the Asianians.
Jaime: Asianians?
Dexter: Armenian + Asian = Asianians
Jaime: lol
Dexter: I'll invite her over tonight to watch The Perfect Getaway with Little Donna and I. It has Hawaiian flair and I must see how they represent the locals.
Jaime: She wants alone time with you! you know how jealous she is that you spend more time with a 15-year old than her?
Dexter: I'm playing daddy.
Jaime: lol


~~~


Dexter: It's working.
Little Donna: what?
Dexter: Remember what Michelle said about Abi getting jealous because we've been spending so much time together?
Little Donna: lol thats so mean. i feel bad
Dexter: Don't. this is most amusing. I'm already scheming how I can intensify her jealous fury with carefully placed gestures and remarks.
Little Donna: shes going to hate me
Dexter: So be it. We will justify that outcome in the name of my amusement.
Little Donna: lol
Dexter: Plus it would be a total turn-off if she felt anything negative towards you. You are an innocent bystander in this episode. What sort of mother would she make? This is an opportunity for me to discover, on a deeper level, what sort of character she is and how she handles herself in such situations.
Little Donna: a test? lol
Dexter: You know that picture in the dining room she framed for me of her and me sky-diving?
Little Donna: yes?
Dexter: I'm replacing the picture of her and me and instead I'm putting the most adorable picture of you and I in there. She's coming over tonight to watch The Perfect Getaway with us, so this is a most favorable time.
Little Donna: lol thats mean
Dexter: I need opportunities to point out to her how stupid it is for her to be jealous. I'm going to ostentatiously shove it in her face until she feels silly.
Dexter: I am one psychologically vicious do-it-for-the-lulz boyfriend you don't ever want to fall in love with. I'm teaching you such methods while you're young and pliable.
Little Donna: ill try and sit by you and open your beer tonight. lol
Dexter: To quote the great Dexter, "It's strange to have a creation out there - a deeply mutated version of yourself, running loose and screwing everything up. I wonder if this is how parents feel."
Little Donna: ?
Dexter: You have much to learn, my apprentice.

[coromoro]

Wow... that was great. I hope you can fill us in on how everything goes later. :cool:

[Angelwang]

haha oh dexter.

[BLUNTMASTER X]

creepy as hell

[Slade]

Post the results!

I feel like I got a lot of depth out of those two short IM conversations.

[Apathetic]

Dexter: I'm playing daddy.


I will use this one day.

[Shade]

This is why you get a girlfriend that's already friends with your girl friends.

Dude I can't help but feel that one day you're gonna meet a girl who's not gonna put up with this stuff and shove it all back at you.

[ExoXile]

I'm surprised that there is so many that are.

[Angelwang]

maybe dexter attracts the dummies. i know i certainly attract the babies

[Dexter]

Dexter: I'm replacing the picture of her and me and instead I'm putting the most adorable picture of you and I in there.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v493/cosplaydexterity/IMG00040-20100126-1344.jpg

When Abi saw this, she just looked at me with the goofiest smile. I acted like I didn't know why she was looking at me that way until she pointed it out to me, then I acted like I was caught and said "I meant to switch it back before you got here." lulz followed with a clever, amusing conversation.

Dude I can't help but feel that one day you're gonna meet a girl who's not gonna put up with this stuff and shove it all back at you.

I wish. If I had met a girl like this, like me, I'd probably marry her by now. See Down With Love. The twist at the end was a romance come true. Let me get that Barbara Novak piece.

[Ant]

picture. tales of vesperia. some sort of bikini? and path of the kabbalah all in one picture.

[Apathetic]

snakes on a plane t

[Dexter]

Snakes on a Plane shirt is gnarly.

Little Donna contributes her thoughts on Wolfy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_U3lYqRySmA

[Apathetic]

uncle dexter!

[Dexter]

Not a real uncle. It's an Filipino thing.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090210113731AAOqWgR

[BLUNTMASTER X]

gonna be hard to get a bj from her with those huge braces

[Angelwang]

thank god i never had braces, my teeth are naturally perfect

[Dexter]

Abigail: I thought you were on your way?!
Dexter: I was, but first I have to take Donna to school and she forgot her ID so we came back to get it.
Abigail: ugg. She's always slowing you down
Dexter: It's fine. I'm not really in a hurry. Plus we kinda made a mess of her room last night so I'm not surprised that she misplaced it.
Abigail: Well I want you to hurry. I'm making you breakfast and I haven't seen you in two days.
Dexter: Seriously, it's only been two days? Wow, time flies.
Abigail: ......when you're having fun.
Dexter: Should I play dumb here and act like I don't notice that your assumption of me having fun has a lot of personal emotions connected to it?
Abigail: and truth.
Dexter: True. I won't deny it. ^_^
Abigail: did she find her id yet?
Dexter: No.
Abigail: how did you make her room a mess last night?
Dexter: We were making Youtube videos. Our fans demanded it.
Abigail: ohhhh! jaime saw you guys on TFC.
Dexter: We were radical. Pinoy style. The Filipinos never knew such a man as myself ever existed. After I sang and gave my speech, I knew I had won the hearts of all those Filipinos. They were laughing like crazy. I was their Dane Cook.
Abigail: that's what I heard.
Dexter: My introduction even made me chuckle. They were like "the Hawaiian Viking, the Armenian Terrorist, the American Jedi, the one and only Dexter!!!" and then my theme song was some Romanian Anthem followed by Kris Aquino-Yap giving me a proper Asian bow of respect and greeting. It was such a mix of cultures, at that moment I totally forgot all about personifications and found myself feeling like The Cable Guy.
Abigail: lol
Dexter: I felt like many people, including Mark Bellison, because those Filipinos were so gullible. Like your friend Jaime, I feel like I could convince them of anything. I Big Fished a lot of stories while on the show but they took it all deadly serious, which worked for my benefit.
Abigail: Big Fished?
Dexter: Forget that reference. We need to discuss your friend. You know I had Jaime believing that they used submarines in order to locate and destroy the remaining mermaids?
Abigail: lol well she's not used to liars!
Dexter: Again, I feel like Mark Bellison. I use my lies, in this particular case, for training purposes and experimentations. Her innocence is cute but if she continues to live life as if everyone is telling the truth, then she's in for a lot of detrimental surprises.
Abigail: You always out to teach everyone?
Dexter: Uh oh. I know where this is going. *plans escape*
Abigail: What are you trying to teach me?
Dexter: Too late. Telling you might defeat the purpose and sometimes the outcome is the individual gets so paranoid of being constantly tested that they don't act normally. This is sometimes good because it teaches them to personify themselves and act according to their environment, but since we are on a more personal level...
Dexter: Ok, I was going to make a romantic excuse on our personal level but the truth is it would lesson my amusement.
Abigail: The hell!?
Dexter: You really want me to give it away? Is this the part of the film where the twist comes and you find yourself thinking back on all the prior scenes and how they fit in with the plot-twist?
Abigail: Fucking tell me!
Dexter: Whoa, calm down! Ok. Remember when you came over and you found a picture of Donna and I in that picture frame you got me?
Abigail: yes
Dexter: I called that The Jealousy Intensifier. The purpose was because you were getting so preposterously jealous of Donna and I spending so much time together, I thought I would make it worse and try to break you with more of Donna and myself's utter cuteness and chemistry. ^_^
Abigail: Did I fail?
Dexter: The test is still underway. Many more experimentations are in the works. I need to know that the mother of my children won't get too jealous of her daughter if daddy's spending a lot of time with her.
Abigail: Really?! Are you asking me to.....
Dexter: What? Oh heavens no! I'm not asking you to marry me. I said mother as in whoever is going to be the mother of my children. Not that I have already determined you to be the mother. You have... potential though.
Abigail: I feel silly now. Can you just come over?
Dexter: We would never have such amusing conversations in person. You going to get all lovey dovey and physical. Donna found her ID before mermaids were even mentioned. I'll be there soon, my loveydoveyhoneydearsweetypiecupcakesugarplumdonutb unny.

[Shade]

Christ... this girl.

[Dexter]

She is totally losing the game. She''s definitely running out of lives, while I'm leveling up, gaining exp, and defeating the evil empire which is her hope in the future of this relationship.

Donna and myself's utter cuteness and chemistry. ^_^

I love how while telling her about my jealousy traps I still can't help but say things like this.

You have... potential though.

Not cool, dude. You keep leading her on like this isn't going to help the situation. You know it's not going to work. You know that your amusement isn't enough to justify your treatment of her. Even if you are the best guy she'll ever meet, and you make her incredibly happy, you should still let her go. She'll appreciate it later, once the heartache fades away and she meets some other poor dude. And you barely have time for her anymore anyway, with all these kids to take care of. You have responsibilities so it's time to stop messin' around with the locals.

But wait, I'm willing to bet that even if she knew you were going to break up, even if she knew the relationship would never work out and you would never love her, that she would still continue with it because she knows that's it's the best thing she's got going on in her life; the most joyful aspect of her existence, and she's willing to stick with it until you finally decide to move on. Maybe she'll just tell herself that there's still hope, that maybe love will form with more exposure, like you will somehow reach the point where you can't live without her. Girls delude themselves in easy to manipulate ways.

Stop right there! You telling yourself that she would continue even though she knows you don't love her and never will is simply a way for you to justify what you're doing to her. I caught you now, Dex! We gone full-circle on this one.

[Slade]

Abigail: Did I fail?
Dexter: The test is still underway. Many more experimentations are in the works. I need to know that the mother of my children won't get too jealous of her daughter if daddy's spending a lot of time with her.
Abigail: Really?! Are you asking me to.....
Dexter: What? Oh heavens no! I'm not asking you to marry me. I said mother as in whoever is going to be the mother of my children. Not that I have already determined you to be the mother. You have... potential though.

That's not even close to the real reason. but you already covered that

It seems like all you get out of this relationship is a kitten to play with. What if you were with someone that was on your level and actually augmented your life with their own adventurousness instead of only being useful in exploring yourself? Pretty much what I'm seeing is that Dexter is in love with Dexter, and this girl is like a corn husk doll that you pretend to like while you're liking yourself even more.

I'm not sure if she's even helping you understand yourself anymore, from the looks of it, because you already seem bored. Why not take a real risk and try out someone who will threaten your coolness with theirs?

[Dexter]

Interesting. I like the idea that she's there to reflect my own self-love. That actually makes a lot of sense. It started as any romantic relationships start for me. It was an opportunity to see if something was there that could last a lifetime. I quickly realized that there wasn't, and I still linger in it simply because I feel we haven't quite reached the end yet. Yes, I do get amusement from it, but I do feel it's time for me to move on. I know we'd still be friends after the breakup aftermath. I honestly think we make better friends than romantic partners. I just don't and could never love her romantically. I think I help her more than she helps me. She really doesn't teach me a whole lot about myself but I teach her a whole lot. She'll leave this relationship with a lot more than I will, indeed.

And a girl on my level? That's exceptionally difficult for me to imagine. I'm not even sure that's what I want. I think they'd feel too much like my sister.

[Shade]

It was an opportunity to see if something was there that could last a lifetime. I quickly realized that there wasn't, and I still linger in it simply because I feel we haven't quite reached the end yet.

^ I do this all the time. Am doing it currently, actually. I'm with ya Dex.

[Dexter]

Definitely. It isn't epic enough yet. It still seems like there's so much development going on, to abruptly end it now would disrupt the balance of our lives. Even I'm not ready to break up and it's not because of my attachment with her, it's because of the story that is still unfolding. She's still got cards and tactics to use upon me and I don't want to miss out on all that. I have predictions that I want to see come to pass and I think I'm still hoping for some pleasant surprises. The clock's ticking, though, and I think she feels the ball's in her fragile hands. We're entering the moments when a girl might possibly go to extreme measures in order to attain or prove something. Interesting, unique times are ahead. Times when a part of themselves are occasionally released that they didn't know existed. Ah, I'm getting excited just thinking about it.

[Linko_16]

I like the idea that she's there to reflect my own self-love. That actually makes a lot of sense.

I thought you were aware of this already. I've noticed your ego is a big part of your relationship with practically anyone you talk about. I think that "will it last forever" kind of relationship you want isn't going to happen until you meet a woman you actually respect, equally to if not more than yourself.

Also, as much as timing is important, it's kind of rude to her to stay in a relationship you know you don't want to be in when she's expecting more from you.

But what do I know! *fap fap fap fap fap*

[Angelwang]

I think the 'love yourself before you can love others' has gone a bit far, here. You love yourself so much that there is no room for another. It is a lonely existence...

[Dexter]

I thought you were aware of this already. I've noticed your ego is a big part of your relationship with practically anyone you talk about. I think that "will it last forever" kind of relationship you want isn't going to happen until you meet a woman you actually respect, equally to if not more than yourself.

I was aware of it, but the concept got me thinking about it on many different levels. Do I like them reflecting myself? How can this be detrimental to my other relationships? Do I have control over it? The happily ever after relationship won't happen unless I respect a girl for various reasons. I respect Abi in some aspects, but she doesn't have the wisdom I seek or the self-respecting skills. I don't think she would make a good mother or even a good wife. She's beautiful and fun, though.

My entire mentality about romantic relationships is vastly different from the norm. Your typical male would do everything within his power not to lose a fantastic girl like Abigail, while I will consciously and devotingly do everything within my power to make sure I don't fall for her. My male friends are definitely jealous of me and don't understand how I could not love her as she does me. My obligations are not romantically self-centered, though, for I have too many other responsibilities that I place before it; primary objectives I make sure not to get distracted from, such as Little Donna and The Filipino Children.

Also, as much as timing is important, it's kind of rude to her to stay in a relationship you know you don't want to be in when she's expecting more from you.

It's not that I don't currently want to be in it, it's that I don't believe this is going to be the happily ever after. And trust me, I've thought about the detrimental points of staying in the relationship with her, but this isn't against Abi's will. She knows where I stand, my uncertainty. I've eloquently expressed where I stand and how I feel. She continues with our relationship because she is in love with me and will fight for survival, like a devoted, loyal, infatuated girl. She's chasing her dream and I respect that enough to give her time for adjustments. I'm pretty much still at the same point I was when I started the relationship, which is trying it on and seeing how it fits and feels. I can't quit on her yet. She still has cards left to play. Also, I'm not sure if she really expects more from me quite yet. She hopes a lot, and dreams like a child, but if she's at all logical then she knows I have a long way to go before I reach the position she wants me to.

But what do I know!

I have enough wisdom to realize that I don't need knowledge. If I was foolish enough to allow my lack of knowledge to stop me from pressing towards my goals, I wouldn't have been able to do half the activities I've done. Fortunate for me I'm ambitious enough to ignore my ignorance. In this aspect, my life is analogous to Frank Abagnale Jr.

I think the 'love yourself before you can love others' has gone a bit far, here. You love yourself so much that there is no room for another. It is a lonely existence...

Not true. It might sound that way from this shred of evidence in this particular romantic discussion, but the reality of my life is that I love a great many people. Little Donna, my sister Fairy, and Wolfy just to name a few. I care so much for them and love them unconditionally. I would easily sacrifice myself for them and in a lot of ways I do. Torture me in the most imaginable sadistic way possible and my love for them would get me through it. The sacrifices I make for them are ones I would never hold against them; never regret. I care about them and think about what's best for them daily. I scrutinize them carefully, as to understand them better, so I could help them more effectively. I am a master of true love, as ardent and sincere as could be. I am the best weapon they have. They can always rest assured that I would be there for them.

And I don't love them because they are on my psychological level. Not because they understand the things I do or even who I truly am. They're not particularly wise or always fun to be around or even interesting. I just care for them so much that it must be love. Even if they didn't love me in return, I would still love them. It's my love and they don't even have the power to take it away from me. I feel it is truly unconditional love.

But this isn't romantic love. I'm not sure I've ever been romantically in love. For me the difference is vast and knowing myself well enough to tell the difference is important. I've gotten to know Abigail quite well. People have the ability to fall in love easily because many want it so desperately, but do we all have the ability to know if it is romantic love or just love? It's a difficult concept to grasp, I think.

I'm not dismissing the idea that I may not be entirely capable of romantic love. I feel like it is a possibility, but highly unlikely. These, along with numerous other emotions and conceptions, are still being investigated using my dextasmic capabilities. I feel like expressing them as honestly as possible is important, so bare with me as my future unfolds. I'm sure many of you will read with great distaste, perhaps to the point where you simply dismiss me entirely as an abnormal individual. To avoid self-betrayal, I'm going to try and not hide anything, to live life as an open book, often times against my own natural feelings. So no matter how strange, totally creepy, or disturbing it might seem, I'm going to do my best to express it. Socially, this seems to be working, for my personal, in real life relationships seem to thrive and last and are, in general, exceptionally successful.

I know many of the stages I go through, the experiences I have, and what I feel, can't possibly be that different from others. I hope that through my experiences the people around me learn about themselves, myself, and humanity as a whole. Many recognizable traits are here. Many new ideas about human behavior and emotions, while shocking and probably sometimes difficult to fully comprehend, are still worth studying and contemplating upon.

Furthermore, Angelwang, my life is not lonely. The idea of me being lonely is laughable. I can't remember ever being lonely. I've always had love in my life, as far back as I could remember, and imagining a future without love is a difficult future to grasp. I might not have romantic love for another, but they do for me, and I feel that. I feel their yearning for me, their fantasies of me being theirs forever. It's flattering and powerful and not something I just decide to toy with for the lulz. I give it a shot, for myself and for them. They deserve at least that much. Also, not giving the romantic relationships the proper time and dedication it deserves is a sign of me giving up on the idea for myself. I'm not necessarily out here searching for love at all. I'm not even halfway convinced that I even need a forevermore romantic partner. I'm more convinced that I am better off without it, but not fully convinced to shut it out completely.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v493/cosplaydexterity/2010/first/265.jpg

[Fairy]

awwwwwww. you should show her this! i want to see what she thinks after she reads that.

[Seelenfeuer]

I think that Dexter is creepier every time I read new posts by him in this thread.

[Shade]

Damn that girl is gorgeous.

Pass on my compliments, Dex.

[Dexter]

Don't let her gorgeous appearance deceive you. She'll use our weakness of superficiality to humble us into severe submission. She's full of devotional overdose and possessive frustration, lulz-worthy fury and uncalled for jealousy. She wants to trap us by desire and make us Game Over. And she's not even the final boss. She's just a mini-boss that popped out of no where along the way.

[Shade]

Well in any case, I'd hope she'd have a lot of HP. I mean damn.

[Fairy]

she must have alot of hp to still be dealing with my bro. lol j/k love ya bro!!!! :)